Thursday, June 9, 2016

when you meet your aidan.






i've always thought carrie bradshaw was a bit of an idiot for not choosing aidan,
i mean, can i get an amen?
{if you're currently amen'ing, read this article by buzz-feed}

he was perfect.
handsome and kind and funny and he loved every bit of her crazy.
he was the calm to her frenzy,
the assurance to her doubt,
the kindness to her selfish,
the low to her high maintenance,
etc, etc, etc.
and let's not forget about the time he took the oath of secrecy to miranda's pregnancy,
by swearing on carrie's chanel sweater...WITHOUT EVEN LAUGHING AT HER!

he was perfect for the 5 million women who watched that show every sunday night,
but he wasn't perfect for her.
which, as was most of the reason we all fell in love with that show,
brought up an interesting concept about dating and love.
can someone be a truly great man, but not the right fit?
while the literal definition of human perfection is not attainable,
{ladies, read that last sentence a few times, k?}
many might believe that if someone is a good person, this means they fit.
whether it be a fear that no one else will love you again,
or of being alone,
or finding peace with good not great,
i don't know, exactly.
and for some i am sure that does work.
but not me.
it's a facet to the battlefield of love i never fully comprehended until i met my own aidan.
and at the end of it,
there were two broken hearts at my table.

it was fast and furious.
you meet someone and the connection is there.
and your differences scare you, 
but the way your souls collide makes it impossible to walk away.
and he isn't just good,
he's a perfect puzzle piece.
and there are three word sentences traded back and forth,
and talks of a white dress and lifetimes spent together.
but then that enemy named reality comes knocking at your door.
and you begin to realize if love was really all it took to make something move forward,
there would be a lot less heartache in this world.

not to throw the beatles under a bus here but,
love is not all you need.

and he would probably say his heartache was more so than mine,
because i was the one who did the breaking.
i held his heart in my hands and gave it back.
but he held mine in his,
and i had to take mine back,
without any prompting other than deep down knowing it wasn't right.
a seemingly impossible task when there was no anger, no place to put any blame,
just life getting in the way of love.
the realization that the seemingly perfect piece to the puzzle,
is not the perfect fit.

you move forward and you move on,
because time is a fabulous friend like that.
and it helps you become a little bit softer to those in your past who hurt you,
because you understand it's not always a malicious action, just the right one.
but it also helps you realize,
you truly are the person that refuses to settle for anything less,
than the right butterflies.

xoxo.

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