Sunday, June 12, 2016

just keep swimming.

i have previously stated on an occasion or two why i very rarely get religious on here.
my religion is an incredibly important and sacred facet to my life,
and it is not, nor will it ever be, up for group/blog discussion.

this sunday morning went a little differently than the rest.
i was up and down all night feeling like i suddenly had to solve all the problems in my life.
why 4:12 in the morning always seems like the necessary time to do these things,
i will never know,
but it ALWAYS seems to rock that way, am i right?
so after finally falling to sleep, 
my 7:15am church alarm went off and i woke up in a not so great mood.
to no surprise of anyone,
i hadn't solved the world's problems overnight,
and i just felt off.
the kind of off where the weight of the world suddenly seems to come crashing down on my, 
very sore from yesterday's workout, shoulders...
i missed my family,
i missed my friends,
i felt lonely and frustrated and just plain blah.
after rolling around in bed for a solid 15 minutes trying everything in me to shake the feeling,
i decided to stay home from church and do some personal studying of my own.
{for the record, this post is not an advocation for skipping church}
{hold back the pitchforks, folks}

after a while of studying i was able to realize that the basis of my over-night-frenzy was not actually my inability to discover world peace,
but my inability to find personal peace through my recent impatience with God.

in this life i have almost certainly mastered the art of asking for what i want,
i, however, have in no way, shape, nor form,
mastered the art of patiently waiting for things to fall into place when they are best for me.
i can be molasses pace patient with people,
but i'm as quick as a racer with myself.

{in fact, as i sat down to write this post, sam hunt's take your time, came on the radio}
{okay Lord, point taken}

so while i was cooking breakfast i turned on this talk that president dieter f. uchtdorf,
{one of the apostles in our church}
gave a few years back titled:
continue in patience

i know many of you lovelies here are not religious in my specific way,
or perhaps not so religious at all.
however, one of my favorite things about this talk is that it encompasses everyone,
from any belief or background.
because it doesn't matter where your faith lies,
we all experience times in our lives where we persist and move forward,
and yet it still seems nothing is falling into place as we see it would be best.

my favorite part of the discussion is when he talks about this exact feeling,
explaining that if we continue to persist with courage, grace and faith,
we will once day look back from the mountain we built through our persistence,
and realize the effort encompassed in that accomplishment is what made us into 
who we wanted to be all along.

so just in case you are having a day as well,
and didn't manage to discover world peace either,
take a listen...
i assure you the world peace will not come,
but the personal peace will.

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