Sunday, November 15, 2015

sweet november.

{wild - cheryl strayed}

growing up, novembers were always my favorite.
every year they brought a birthday and turkey and gratitude and the lingering of halloween with a hint of christmas to come.

but then life happens,
and so november comes with everything above still,
but now always with a trace of the past.
and while it's a past i no longer wish had been my future,
{thank gracious for those unanswered prayers}
there is still that faint sting.
mostly that the girl i was, blissfully trusting and naive,
will never be me again.

i'd be lying if i said i didn't miss that girl sometimes,
the one who welcomed people in without questioning ulterior motives 
and looked at love through rose colored glasses.
she always believed it was just around the corner.
and for a minute...she believed she had found it.

but there is something that comes along with heartbreak.
because after the part that just about kills you,
comes the part where you have a choice to let it build you up again.
not as the person you once were, 
but as the person you decide you are going to be. 
braver and stronger and kinder and, one day, full of hope again.

so welcome, sweet november.
it took me a while to get here,
but i think we can finally be friends.

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