Sunday, May 29, 2011

what do you want from me?

tonight i am tired of:
it raining.
{all. the. time.}
being replaceable in people's lives.
sunday blues.
not being able to talk to my little brother.
my tummy ache.
missing home.
feeling like i am never enough.
living in this state.
mean people.
my family being hundreds of miles away.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

one final love letter.

tonight i am an emotional wreck.
not because anything bad happened in my day,
and no i am not pmsing.
oh no, it is so much worse than that...
today was the final day of OPRAH.

remember my [extreme love] for this lady?
and thee time of my life at the oscar oprah show...
all [one], [two], [three] entries?!?!

the past two days have been MEGA fun watching a spectacular end come for an ever spectacular woman.
although my favorite part of the 2 hour, 2 day event was kristin chenoweth singing for good, from one of my fav fav musicals wicked, with the 400 men oprah helped send to college.

[i was an emotional WRECK after this point with no saving me]

well loves, today it came to an end.
the spectacles and surprises were gone and it was just oprah and her audience.
i know she is not the perfect cup of tea for all of you.
but if you were classy enough to watch, i think you could agree with me that her words today came from nothing short of a woman with a humble heart, and sincere gratitude for the audience that gave her HER dream.

as she pointed out, she has made many mistakes.
but she hoped her viewers knew she always did so with the best intentions.
she relived her best show moments and handed over the best advice she had been given over the years.

each one of you has your own platform. you can help somebody. you can listen. you can forgive. my greatest wish for you is that you carry whatever you are supposed to be doing, and don't waste anymore time. you are responsible for the energy you create for yourself. and the energy you bring to others. don't wait for somebody else to save you, to complete you, to fix you. i won't say "goodbye." i'll just say, "until we meet again."

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

i dreamed a dream.

today i received an email from PMACK titled:
i dreamed about eating. i woke up hungry and pissed off.

guys, dieting is NOT for sissys.
wish us luck during our last 2 weeks of starvation...
ehhh, i mean healthy eating.

Monday, May 23, 2011

a very merry un-birthday

today is moi's 1/2 birthday.
really this has no meaning in life,
except for giving me a day in which i contemplate the things i have accomplished in the past few months.
ya know, since i grew old and turned the big 24.

very merry un-birthday achievements:
overcame my fear of living with best friends and ruining friendships by moving in with thee besties in april.
getting excited to welcome thee bff's baby in july. eek!
lost 15 pounds. {and counting}
watched the royal wedding live with thee mom on the other end of the phone.
joined twitter. yay?
chopped my hair and dyed it somewhere between kate middleton brown and jennifer aniston blonde.
survived 7 months of the hardest church assignment
i have ever had.
learned that mom was right,
karma is really really good sometimes.
sent lil bro out on a mission. and currently missing him everyday.
started thinking about grad school options with some help from thee parents.
went to a taping of oprah.
learned to let go of what i cannot control.
restored a broken heart.
and fell in love with my life, all over again.

so hip-happy day to me!
here is to another 6 months.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

a disney life for me.

went to see the new pirates yesterday manana with thee bff and her hubby.
loved it.
not as great as the first [nothing ever will be], but leaps and bounds ahead of the second and third.
i did miss kiera and orlando for about 30 minutes,
then penelope came in and hottiemchottie priest and it was smooth sailing til thee end.
but even more so than loving the movie,
it made me miss disneyland.
yes lovelies,
i have been there probably over a thousand times,
am still not tired of it.
and hopefully, i never will be.

night night.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

ni ni?

loves, i can sum up my absence from visiting with you the past few days in two words...
master cleanse.

remember how beyonce did this and lost 20 pounds for dreamgirls?
and my girl g.paltrow does it once a year?
well, PMack {another story for another day}
and moi have decided to tread in these lovely footsteps and give it a try.
we both want to quit. or atleast i do.
but we are in a competition and i was not raised to back down from anything.
so we continue along with this stupid thing.

stupid thing in question?
yogurt or an egg for breakfast.
salad for lunch.
fish and veggies for dinner.
downing two 32 oz bottles {aka: ni-ni}
of "cleanse lemonade" a day.
with equal parts water.
excersising 30 mins a day.

all in the name of friendly competition and a city named las vegas calling our names in 2 weeks.
and for your enjoyment...this is what we go through every night trying to down this stuff.


Monday, May 16, 2011

thee new me.

loves i am so tired tonight,
that i am off to bed to read myself into wonderland.

but i have news...
i might just maybe have chopped my hair off.
yep, pretty much all of it.
it may look like this...and i am seriously so in love with it.
this wknd is the color change.
promise to keep you updated.

night night.
sweet dreams.
kiss kiss kiss.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

gotta get down on friday.

some people may judge me for staying in on a friday night.
what do i say to them?
well, you have never spent a friday night with moi and thee besties.

first up on the list of plans, work out.
ya, it sucks. but everyone has to do it.
or atleast skinny people do.
or like, people who are TRYING to be skinny.

next step, walking to carls to visit our c.jr friends.
we ate glorified lettuce, basically.
but we sat at our fav table and enjoyed the food,
or lack thereof.

then we came home and thee besties laid in my bed watching he's just not that into you, while i walked around and cleaned my room.
and, of course, we cried. as always.

then we all laid in the bed talking and mellie asked the question that will never go forgotten...
have you read the jennifer love hewitt book i gave you for your birthday yet?
my answer: no.
her answer: let's read it now. like outloud.
less than 1 minute later we started popcorn reading the book.
2 hours later we were done.
cover to cover.

favorite quote:
my body is a temple. not a 7-11.
ohhh jlh, we should be best friends.

Friday, May 13, 2011

win. win.

eek, i have been wanting to share this story for a whole week, but def wanted to wait until the winners were announced, so that i could share a complete story with you all, rather than snippets.
[apparently the oprah segments almost put some into fits]

are you ready?
last weekend, something borrowed author emily giffin announced that she was holding a contest for all those who went to see the movie.
the price of entry was a picture of you at the movies seeing something borrowed, or with your ticket stub.
now loves, the prize was almost too much for me to handle, so i basically set on a mission to win.
seeing as giffin is my favorite author and i may or may not have this painting framed on my bookshelf next to all my copies of her novels...
...i decided this was my route.

i got my best girlfriends together and we made a plan.
each of us dressed as one of these girls, we grabbed the books and went to the movies.
we saw the film {it was my second time, at that point} and
while at the movies we took numerous shots, enlisting some very gracious onlookers and workers to help us, all the while trying to recreate the painting.
we chose this picture......and sent it in.

we waited four VERY long days to find out who the winners of the contest were.
last night we went with a group of very lovely men to see the movie {yes, again} and while in the film i got a text from thee bff telling me we didn't win.
bummer x12.
when walking out of the movie i checked my phone and got another text from thee bff telling me that thee bestie had once again worked her magic, and we were in fact WINNERS!

the story?
well, e.g. created an album on facebook of the best pictures from the contest and asked people to give their thoughts before announcing the winners.
sadly, we were not in this album, but since we had full confiendce in our entry thee bestie reposted our pic to ms. giffin's wall last night after her winners had been announced.
graciously wondering if our picture had ever been looked at.
within SECONDS e.g. HERSELF commented on our photo with these words...
OMG!!! I LOVE THIS ONE! YOU GUYS ARE MAKIN MY ASSISTANT LOOK BAD (kidding kate) as she went thru my FB page to pull out the best... please email to her, tell her to add to gallery! And you guys win too! Love it!
and within minutes after that she commented again saying...
this really might be my favorite.
she then sent thee bestie a DIRECT email stating...
YOU NOT ONLY WIN, but that might be my favorite. Wow. So glad you reposted! LOVE!

we came home from the movies to the news from thee bestie and immediately started screaming.
why you might ask?
ohhh just because we each won a copy of the book signed by emily giffin AND the entire cast of the film.
that would be kate hudson, john krasinski, colin egglesfield and ginnifer goodwin.
i am still on cloud 9.
as thee bestie put it...
this must be what it feels like to be proposed to.

[giffin girls painting by: inslee hayes]

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

happy birthday S.

yesterday was thee birthday of dear friend S.
due to the fact that she is currently gallivanting on the other side of thee world,
there was no birthday phone call.
and she will have to wait for her birthday card,
because, as per usual, i am behind on such things.
so i figured the next best thing would be a birthday blog.

i know i go on and on about thee amazing friend that she is all the time,
so i won't make you jealy with the details once again.
but i will say she is one of thee best parts of my life.
no matter where i am or what she is doing i always, always, always know i have her in my corner.
she is the person you call after 3 months of not talking, and pick up right where you left off.
and the person who ALWAYS understands what you are feeling,
and not only understands, but knows how to make you feel better with her extreme wit.
there are not many people who i can say that for.
so to say i am lucky to have her as mine would be an understatement.

happy birthday S.
say hello to paris for me.
xoxo, B.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

day for mom.

happy happy mother's day,
to thee ever fabulous woman who taught me everything i know.
which might not be a lot,
but it has always been enough.

totally missing home today,
but especially her.
she is literally thee best friend and confidant i have ever had.
and i don't plan on changing that.

[photo courtesy of]

something a little bit perfect.

ok peeps,
let's have a serious conversation here.
i have NO idea why the critics are not liking
something borrowed.
so do me a favor, and don't listen to them.
i know, i know, a novel idea.
go see it anyway. if you don't laugh til there are tears in your eyes and cry until the same happens, i am convinced you have an un-feeling heart.

last night, we went and saw it AGAIN.
and in a theatre FULL of people,
[men, women, children...don't even get me started on the later]
everyone seemed to be having a blast.
it is smart. it is funny. it has a whole lot of heart.
not one of us in thee group left that theatre with a dry eye.
neither did the sweet man sitting with his wife in front of us.
while the boy sitting in back of us confessed to his date,
that was one of the best movies i have seen all year.
she obviously thought he was mocking her.
so he had to clairfy,
no really, it was surprisingly great.

so loves,
if you ever believe me on anything.
believe me on this.
it is not a masterpiece, nor is it going to change lives for the betterment of the world.
but it is fun and an interesting look at relationships, love and friendship.
while it is perfectly cast, john krasinski takes the trophy for stealing every scene he is in.

and colin egglesfield takes the trophy for stealing my heart.
and my favorite scene?
definitely kate hudson and ginnifer goodwin re-living their childhood dance dreams

if you missed the premise, read [here].
and then watch how it all begins...

i know lots of people are having issues with the fact that it is a film about a girl who is cheating with her best friend's fiancee.
but really, it is not about the adultery.
it is about the fact that everyone knows what it is like to love someone who will never love you back.
or let the chance of love slip by because you tell yourself,
someone like that would never fall for someone like me.
because everyone has that one friend who they feel they can never live up to.
and that one friend who they know will never leave their side.
and everyone knows what it is like to be thee one chosen,
and then be thee one who is not.

happily ever after isn't something you are given.
you work for it. you work really hard for it.
and sometimes it just doesn't work out.
but then again, sometimes it does.
and THAT is a story i can support.

there is a little bit extra that might lead to a little bit of a sequel.

pps- the soundtrack is to die for, as well.
i am currently obsessed with these two songs.
{natashia bedingfield--little too much}
{civil wars--poison and wine}.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

home away from home.

i miss it every day.
sometimes more than i miss home.
like, i ache for it.
and that is not me being dramatic.

thee most beautiful place in the world.
with a culture and people to match.
the end.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

something brilliant.

[sweet mellie and moi, in movie form]

while sitting on thee couch tonight with sweet mellie,
we got to discussing the fact that minus the lying, cheating and fiancee stealing,
something borrowed was basically written about us.
i know, i got my feelings hurt for a wee second too,
seeing as moi would obviously fit into the character of darcy...

[kate hudson as darcy]

but thee roomies have assured me that them being reminded of moi while reading of her this past week is simply because of our fun, wild, fashionable personalities.
and not the fact that she is a self-centered monster.

so our plans were to see the movie sat night.
mellie can't go tomorrow because of work.
i confessed that i probs would go see it without her tomorrow afternoon, and then with her again on saturday.
this left her majorly upset.
i tried to explain i have waited SEVEN years for this movie to come out.
i am gonna do what i have to do. end of story.
but to spare a dramatic fight of sorts
we solved the problem real quickly.

i am going to hate myself in the morning,
but i sure love this tonight.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

say yes to the dress.

yesterday i received the following text from a very, very sweet and dear woman in my life
{and obviously, my new favorite person ever}:

...i LOVED watching the Royal Wedding! And you know what, my will look even more beautiful and classy and poised and sophisticated on your wedding day than Princess Kate!!

guys, i promise i didn't pay her to say that.
and yes, it made me cry.
mainly because there is literally no greater compliment in the world someone could give me.
especially this week, while i am still in obsesssion mode.
and speaking of obsession mode...
tonight i received this email from thee bestie:

I think we should get married in the same month and you'll wear a replica of Kate's wedding dress and I'll wear a replica of the second dress she wore for the reception. I don't think people would judge us too much, do you?

so gents, we are a takin' applications.
the process is rigorous so don't be offended if you don't get a callback.
we love you anyway, but not as more than a friend.**

and now i promise,
no more royal posts for at least 3 days.

**this might seem like a harsh statement,
but that might be because you didn't see PROM last weekend.
i am not really that big of a brat,
and yes i will say yes if you ask me out.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

thee royal wedding round-up.

thee royal wedding.
oh how it still makes me all giddy and excited inside.
like it is on our dvr and i don't plan on letting anyone delete it for some time.
due to the fact that, yes, i fully plan on watching parts of it again.
and maybe again.
let me begin by saying my obsession with london began when i was little and watched peter pan for the first time.
to my smaller self, there was something so magical about that city.
[hopefully it was magical to everyone watching]
[as flying OVER a city is not a normal mode of transportation]
the love continued through my childhood, as i was raised by a classy lady who loves all things europe.
then i moved to scotland and had the opportunity to spend thee most perfect week in london with thee dear friend.
after that, it was officially a full fledged, probably life long, obsession.

i will never forget rolling in on the train and taking pictures at platform 9 3/4.
or sitting outside the hard rock cafe my first night in the city i had dreamed my whole life of being in.
strolling through kensington gardens and thinking of princess di.
learning how to navigate the tube.
turning into a tennis lover while sitting on the sidelines of wimbledon.
not believing wendy when she said we will rock you was going to be one of the greatest musical experiences of my life. and her proving me wrong.
sitting 5th row for chicago.
watching thee fabulous kerri ellis kill it as elphaba in wicked.
[it is better in london than america...wait? did i just say that?]
buying my pink purse in harrods, and worshiping that thing all the way home.
standing outside of buckingham palace and thinking to myself...
i finally made it.
and NEVER wanting to leave.

in fact as the taxi driver was taking me to the train stop the morning i was flying out i was super quiet.
he drove me through the city and i just looked out the window, taking it all in one last time.
i started to silently cry.
he must have looked back at me and seen the tears in my eyes, because in thee most comforting voice, he said to me...
don't worry love. you will be back one day.
now i think about that moment every day, constantly planning HOW and WHEN i will be back.

which is why, lovelies, thee royal wedding was such a major occurance in my life.
i fell in love with london and its culture long ago, and don't really plan on letting go of that anytime soon.
thee bestie and moi began thee wedding experience with the lifetime original movie, william & kate.
it was minorly awful, but fun to watch. correction, fake prince william was fun to watch.
we continued on with the BBC special, diana's dresses.
which, as corny as it was...i found it completely mesmerizing to see her dresses and the stories behind them from the designers who remember her so well, still to this day.
my favorite part was the interview with a designer who used to provide her with a lookbook every season and she would pick out the ones she liked best.
he said that she would put comments on each of the pages, and on the pages where she was requesting a dress, she always wrote, please.
then it was off to bed for us mini-princesses, with my alarm set for 3:30am.

i woke up to taylor swift blasting my ear at 2:45am, meaning my mother was calling.
david and victoria beckham just arrived. turn on your tv. how are you still in bed?!?
[yep, the apple does not fall far from the tree]
thee following is a list of thoughts from moi, moi's mom, moi's boss, thee dear friend and author emily giffin.
basically, all the cool girls stayed up to watch this folks.
sorry if you missed out, but don't say i didn't warn you...

that's it guys, everyone is wearing hats to my wedding. decision made.
no shame in arriving in a bus.
emily giffin
ugh! camilla looks fat. WHO DRESSED HER and why was there not a royal fitting? i like her hat though.
thee mom
spare me, not the day to talk about charles and camilla's 40 year love affair.
emily giffin
why have they not used the royal money to get camilla's teeth fixed?
thee mom
prince william looks dashing in red. harry looks hot. i might need to go for him.
eek! beatrice and eugenie look like the evil stepsisters from cinderella.
thee mom and emily giffin {it must have REALLY been true}
kate middleton's family looks better than the royal family. i hope i can look as classy as her mother when i get older. no, for seriousness here.
glad you texted me, i almost slept through her arrival. she looks flawless.
thee boss
love love love her dress. she is so pretty
thee dear friend
why are her boobs sticking out? i wouldn't wear it, but she looks beautiful...oh okay, i love it.
thee mom
PIPPA!! eek! gorgeous. my bridesmaids are wearing that dress.
ohhh look at the babies. they are so cute! oh everyone looks so great.
thee mom
diane sawyer needs to shut up about the whole she wonders if kate middleton is thinking of all the women who came before her and drove that path to the church to enter into history stuff. no, she is thinking about the fact that this is her WEDDING DAY. cut it diane, now.
whelp here she goes.
thee mom, as her tv powered down right when kate started walking down the aisle.
okay, we are back in business
thee mom, as her tv powered back up again
did you see him whisper "you look beautiful?" oohhh i can't stand it!
emily giffin
okay, i will let you go now because we can't talk during the ceremony, we need to just watch. i will text you though.
thee mom
i wonder if the people sitting next to elton john feel they are getting a free concert during the singing of the hymns.
is that the only ring she gets?!?!
confused text from thee mom
well that was just about thee shortest ceremony ever. 10 mins in and they are married. nice.
she can't stop smiling. they both just look so happy.
thee boss
harry is crying. i'm crying. let's all cry together folks.
phone rings: okay, so i know we are not supposed to be talking, just watching, but how do i connect to twitter.
thee mom
i am so glad i am watching this live. i feel so connected to the world. and now, i am connected to twitter. love you, bye.
thee mom
emily giffin & moi
good thing this is on in the middle of the night so that no one is around to see me cry. singing that song always makes me cry.
ooohhh i so hope this thing ends happily ever after
emily giffin
hahaha. harry has to ride with the babies in the carriage.
they look so happy and in love. i hope it works.
text to thee mom
it will. i think it's the real thing.
text from thee mom

of course, my sweet mother and moi discussed the thing all day long.
constantly calling each other back and forth when new photos were published on
off to get my collector's people mag today.
last night i walked into thee bestie's room for us to go to church and she was talking forever to get ready so i hurried her up.
her respone?
i can't go looking like a slob when you are looking like country singer barbie over her.
my response?
nuh-uh...i am kate middleton barbie.

Monday, May 2, 2011

forever and always.

[photo courtesy of]

i promise to have a royal rundown of all things/opinions will & kate tomorrow.
because let's be honest, i am STILL not over it.
you shouldn't be either.
but for today i have to pay special attention to thee most recent birthday girl in my life,
thee bestie.

we have been celebrating for about 2 weeks now,
but it's okay because she deserves all great things that could ever possibly come her way.
back when it was her actual birthday i asked her to fill out a lovely questionnaire so that you could get to know her a little bit better,
and help me celebrate all things bestie...
1. Where were you born?
I was born in Upland, California. Fun fact about the day I was born: after they took me away to be cleaned and I came back with red hair, my mom told them they brought her the wrong baby. She wasn't kidding.

2. What is your favorite Birthday memory?
Can this year count? I am pretty sure I'll always remember coming home to Jessica and Melanie dressed up like Rhiannon and Marianne from Easy A and hearing, "You have 20 minutes to turn yourself into Olive Pendergast. We're having an Easy A birthday party!" It's not normal how easily we could turn into Sister Christian, B.T. and the ever-fabulous Miss Emma Stone.

3. What is the best Birthday gift you have ever been given?
I got a pretty fabulous beach cruiser for my birthday last year. And this year my best friends are throwing me a Great Gatsby 1920s party. I'm pretty sure I haven't had a single year go by where my family and friends don't make me feel incredibly loved.

4. What are your top 3 goals for this year?

-Be a better teacher (whether that means going to more conferences and starting grad school)
-Read more
-Be happy!

5. In one word, describe yourself?
I asked my mom. She said, "spunky." I argued with her, but she wouldn't budge.

6. Other than your birthday, what is your favorite Holiday?
Can I say Earth Day since that's still my birthday? Juuuuuust kidding. I also love Christmas and Fourth of July. Did you put the "other than your birthday" because you knew I'd say my birthday?

7. Who is your favorite singer (currently) and why?
If I have to pick a single singer, I'd probably say Taylor Swift. I'm pretty sure I could listen to her music on repeat for my entire lifetime. Close second: Katy Perry (for the same reason). And also because I'm close personal friends with her number one fan.

8. What is your favorite place you have ever visited and why?
New York City. You can spend a day there or you could spend a month there and it's always magical. Plus they have multiple MASSIVE H&Ms.

9. What is your favorite movie (of all time) and why?
Favorite movie currently is very obviously Easy A. However, I also love Stand By Me, because I love a good coming of age story.

10. Leaning a bit on Oprah's way of doing things, what are 5 things you know for sure?
1. I am amazingly blessed with amazing family, friends and relationships that are exactly what I need in my life.
2. The happiest you'll be is when you're serving and thinking about others instead of yourself.
3. Pets make life better.
4. I was meant to be a teacher.
5. The worst of worst days can be cured by playing with nieces.

the thing is, i don't think all the words in the world can express how much i adore her.
although i believe my girl, emily giffin described it best in heart of the matter,
when the main character describes her relatinship with her best friend...

"...[she] reaches out and squeezes my hand, as i realize that i never resent her sympathy, and that i'm always willing to candidly confess any vulnerability, shortcoming or fear, without ever wishing that i could take it back or revise my story later. as such, my self-image squares neatly with her image of me, no disparity between the two--which makes being in her company sheer comfort and luxury, especially when things are falling apart."

it is a relief to have someone who knows me as i know myself, for better or worse.
a blast to have a best friend who takes herself as non-seriously as i take moi's self.
and a blessing to have a sister of whom i love more than she can ever ever know.
happy {belated} birthday m.
here is to another 25.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

nuh-uh, i ain't doin that.

if you are ever visiting our diva den,
and we randomly break out into what seems like a whiny southern accent saying things like,
"you are drivin' me NUTS!"
i feel i need to share this video with you so you don't feel out of place.

if i had a dollar for everytime we have quoted this gal in the last 24 hours i would be halfway to paris by now.